My hubby was unlike any other guy I had ever dated.  Before we were really like “an item” only friends. We were working together on a project at church and had to run to the grocery store.   We were standing together at the check out line and he grabbed a cosmopolitan magazine (which, as usual paraded a beautiful nearly nude woman with every other article featuring something about  sex).

You can imagine I am a little nervous at first as he grabs the magazine, but he did something strange…something I had never seen done before….as quickly as he grabbed it, he turned the magazine backwards and then set it back on the stand. Then looked back at me as if it was a totally normal thing and proceeded to continue our conversation.

Dumfounded and confused I said, “why did you do that….that thing with the magazine?”
Casually with a shrug he replied, “Oh to protect my eyes.  I just don’t want fake images in my mind to compare my wife to one day”

SWOON

He had me at “protect my eyes”

As I found out more about this  totally weird…in a really good way… guy I also realized he had protective programs on his computer from unwanted internet distastefulness.  He even asked himself questions like, “would I be comfortable bringing everything I watched, listened to or read to church with me on Sunday?”

Who was this guy and where had he been all my life?

Eager to tell my friends about this new guy. I specifically remember having the conversation with one of my dear friends “Jessica” (we’ll call her).  She was beautiful.  Likely one of my most beautiful friends.  She was popular smart and had no problem getting boyfriends.  But, like most of my sorority girl friends, she liked to party, hook up with guys, and place Jesus  in a convenient little box, careful not to let Him get in the way of her having fun.

She seemed spellbound but also totally in love with the idea that there were guys out there like this.  She decided she is worthy of a guy like that and with determination she told me, “I’m gonna marry a guy like that.”

I don’t know why I was so surprised to hear her say that, in fact most my friends who heard about this guy “protecting his eyes for his future spouse” all had their hearts flutter like a teenage girl at a one direction concert at the very idea that this type of guy existed.

I didn’t know what to say to Jessica in that moment of her genuine desire to have all these things in her Mr. Right yet hope to find him while not spending any time BECOMING Mrs. Right.

No matter how beautiful or talented she is, guys that are pursing Jesus are looking for a lady that is traveling in the same direction.  The type of guy that is protecting his eyes and his body and whole heartedly pursuing Christ, is not looking for the girls at the bar with tons of sexual experiences under her belt.

It’s like Jessica was headed east and her dream christian man was headed west and she somehow thought they would meet up in the same place and live happily every after with sunshine and rainbows.

I don’t know why I didn’t see it earlier. I was the EXACT same way just a few months before we had this very conversation.  I had recently become a Christian and Jesus had just pulled a total 180 on my life.  I too dreamed of marrying a kind man who would love me just as as Christ loved the church.  I dreamed of him protecting me and him being the spiritual leader of our family one day.

I realize now how hypocritical I was in wanting my dream guy to protect his body, protect his mind, pursue christ, and not having any debt and being devilishly handsome would be a nice bonus.  All the while I assumed I could do as I pleased and expect dream-Jesus-loving-guy to pursue me?

How did this ever make sense to me? And how does this still make sense in the mind of singles everyday?

In Andy Stanley’s love sex and dating series ,and book, he poses a simple yet profound question he asks singles to ask themselves before perusing any relationship:

Are you the person you are looking for, is looking for?
link to his video sermon on this question (psssss..it’s awesome)

The pursuit of a romance to make all your dreams come true is not only impossible but totally unfair to put that burden on another sinful human being.  Jesus is the only one that can truly fulfill you.

Now before you tell me there are no more Christian “fish” left in the sea and nobody else does this.  I think what you really mean is no one  you KNOW does this.

Cars that pass each other going opposite directions on the highway rarely make eye contact.  If you are headed east with Jessica then you don’t truly know what’s happening on the route in the opposite direction.  But if you decide to commit to BECOMING who you are looking for is looking for by going to the right places and and not just believing in Jesus but FOLLOWING him, you will meet the right people

For example, I bet you didn’t know that there are approx. 10 MILLION people on the this planet that identify themselves as a “Bronie” which is some kinda werido “my little pony” uber obsessed GROWN UP MAN.  (No seriously I wish I was kidding, but it’s a thing)

Then not to worry my friends 1/3 of the earths population identifies themselves as christians and there are  90-100 million sold out legit believers in the U.S. alone(source).

When you begin to pursue the teachings of Christ I have no doubt you will quickly meet the right people who are doing the same thing.

What do you think about “becoming who you are looking for is looking for” If you are married did you do this while you were dating?

If you are single, what direction are you headed?

There are three words in the English language that I’m beginning to loathe. Those words are “You Deserve It!” How many times have you heard those words. “Buy yourself a new outfit. You deserve it!” “Take a vacation. You deserve it!” Even the old McDonald’s commercials used it, remember? “You deserve a break today….at McDonald’s!” and L’oreal’s tagline is “I’m worth it”

It makes us feel good right?  We work hard (some harder than others) we tell ourselves we deserve a break so we get a kit kat.  We deserve a vacation so we go into debt.  The list goes on and on.

Something I just can’t seem to get over is this….

The king of the world.  The King of all kings.  The maker of heaven, earth, stars, creation, all the palaces and all the riches in the world….Yes this guy.  This same guy who’s majesty deserves the highest kingdom on the highest throne WILLINGLY left his throne in heaven and put on imperfect and flawed skin and bone to be born IN A STINKY MANGER BESIDE COWS AND DONKEYS.

Can we just take a moment and think about that!!

If nothing else in the gospel story rocks your world this has to.

There was no room for the king of the universe to even stay at an inn the night he was born.  I’m sure Mary was thinking, God you told me I was going to have your child and I can’t even get a hotel room on the night of his birth?

I think there was a reason the most DESERVING person of a palace was born in a stinky manger.  To teach us to think of ourselves a little less.

Humility.  It’s a tough word to grasp in a world where everyone is fighting to be the best.  But this simple picture of the lord of lords in a manger is a reminder to me every time I feel “under appreciated”

I don’t get noticed the time I worked really hard on a project
The king of the world was born in a stinky manger

I don’t get bonus I hoped for
The king of the world was born in a stinky manger

People don’t remember my name
The king of the world was born in a stinky manger

You see my point.  Honestly I really don’t “deserve” anything except hell.  Yet my Lord came down from heaven to take that punishment for me…even though I didn’t deserve it.

Do you find yourself in the “I deserve it” thinking trap?

In the story of Jesus’ birth.  We talk about the wise men, the shepherds, the manger and angels but there within the story lies a hard but somehow comforting truth that nobody talks about.

It’s not glamours, it’s not feel good, and it’s honestly kinda gross.  Here’s the scoop from Matthew 2:

After the birth of Jesus, some magi  visited Herod to inquire the whereabouts of “the one having been born king of the Jews.” Herod, as King of the Jews, was alarmed at the prospect of a usurper. Herod assembled the chief priests and scribes of the people and asked them where the “Anointed One” was to be born. They answered, in Bethlehem.

Herod therefore sent the magi to Bethlehem, instructing them to search for the child and, after they had found him, to “report to me, so that I too may go and worship him”(liar liar pants on fire).

However, after they had found Jesus, they were warned in a dream not to report back to Herod. Similarly, Joseph was warned in a dream that Herod intended to kill Jesus, so he and his family fled to Egypt.

When Herod realized he had been outwitted, he gave orders to kill all boys of the age of two and under in Bethlehem and its vicinity. Joseph and his family stayed in Egypt until Herod’s death, then moved to Nazareth in Galilee.

In Herod’s paranoid, self absorbed, narcissistic way he ordered the MURDER of any baby in Jerusalem under the age of 2. Wikipedia explains Herod as someone, “prepared to commit any crime im order to gratify his unbounded ambition”

“he (Herod) sent and killed all the male children in Bethlehem and in all that region who were two years old or under.” Matthew 2:16

I don’t know if the families in Bethlehem had time to prepare, how much time passed between King Herod’s order and the massacre but I can imagine the scene:  A Roman solider in his full armor banging on the door frames until they shattered as much as the terrified family on the inside of the home.  The soldiers would barge their way in whether the door was opened for them or not.

Turning over the beds, ripping apart their belongings searching for babies.   If they found a baby boy under the age of two they would grab the child, the family would scream, the solider would lift their sword, and….I just can’t type it.

You know what happened

The mother would scream and run to protect her baby but it was too late.  The solider would storm out on to the next home before the door could even shut behind him.

The mother would hold her baby covered in blood weeping and crying asking why!! This makes no sense!  What did this baby do?  WHYYYYY!!!

“Rachel (mother of the nation of Jerusalem) weeping for her children; she refused to be comforted, because they are no more.” Matthew 2:18

The amount of babies murdered is not known for certain, but we know for sure it was ALL of the baby boys of the town of Bethlehem.  Could you imagine every mother and father in your city weeping over the loss of her baby?!

My heart hurts for these families.  For the mothers who had to bury their babies.  This is tragic and heart breaking.

As I think more about these families, who were just like you and me,  I realize today, no one knows their  name.  No one knows the story of these sweet babies who were killed so young. There was no memorial, no avenging of their death, and no one changed their profile picture in to the Bethlehem flag to pay respects. (kidding….but seriously)

The kicker lies in the hard truth that is not really warm and fuzzy, not really the speech you hear at funerals, but oddly comforting.

The truth is…the story was never about those babies.  The story was and will always ONLY be about ONE baby.

No I don’t know the names of these babies or families but the only reason I even know their story is because it was associated with Jesus.

King Herod tried with all his might to make his name great.  He called himself “Herod the Great” killed ANYONE (including three of his own sons) if they made any threat to take his throne.  He spent every human effort to make himself immortal. Yet to all his efforts his name was preserved for only a short time for his “kingdom.”

Two thousand years later the only reason people know his name (outside of a few history buffs) is because of his part in the story of Jesus.

The king of the world was never Herod, not even Leonardo DiCaprio at the bow of the titanic.  (tell me you got that)

The king of the world was and will always be Jesus.

In fact who can you name anyone who made an impact on our world from 2,000 years ago or more?  There are a few names I learned in history class that made remarkable discoveries but no one has been or ever will be the savior of the world who came down from heaven to live among us, be killed by us, and rose again.

That makes his fame last way longer than any other king, hero, or inventor I know of.

The queen of my world was never me, although I have tried to make it that way at times.  My best efforts at becoming rich, popular, smart, or well known are all laughable really.

If I give it my all and pour every resource I have into making something great, people may remember me for a few years…maybe, if I’m lucky. My best efforts at “my kingdom” are gone with me.

But if I can contribute to Jesus’s story.  If I can stop working about the oh so temporary trappings of this world.  If I can let go of that to be a supporting character to the ONLY leading role this world will ever know….that is truly the only way I will every make a lasting impact on this world.

“whoever loses their life for me will find it” Matthew 16:25

The “slaughter of the innocence” as many refer to this event in history is heartbreaking no doubt, but simply because their loss was associated with Jesus’ birth, their story can be remembered.

What can i do today to stop trying to be the “leading role” in my life but a supporting character to the only leading role this world will ever know.

Our homes contain more televisions than people. We spend more on shoes, jewelry, and watches ($100 billion) than on higher education. And the average American woman owns 30 outfits, one for every day of the month—in 1930, that figure was nine.

What is crazy,  over the course of the entire holiday season, we will spend $600 billion adding more and more things to our already crowded homes .

BUT….What if you asked your loved ones do donate to something that mattered this year instead of getting you a dust collector?

Did you know over 26 million children live without parents?  What if you had the potential to change the life of an a child living in foster care or as an orphan.

I have had the privilege to volunteer for an amazing organization in our town that does all the can to help orphans in our community.  And not just food and shelter, but their hearts as well.

Fostering Bulloch is working to secure land to build a TRAC camp that would be open to any child in foster care or a group home in the state!

If you have ever wanted to give to an organization that is helping to change the world I can assure you this is your chance and Fostering Bulloch is your organization.

Gifts are tax deductible and if everyone who saw this video gave even $1 we would meet our goal.

Our crazy video is up to 8,000 views and counting. Please watch below and help make this dream a reality!

Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. Matthew 6:28

Today I had a crappy day…they happen on occasion to everyone sometimes.   And then I caught a glimpse of one of my daylillies blooming for the very first time this season.

It’s simple I guess…just a flower blooming.  Nothing new.  But today I stared at that flower for a good long while.

If you know anything about gardening they are called day lilies for a reason.  They only bloom for one day.  Just ONE DAY.

It just made me think, if I was the creator (and let’s all be glad I’m not) I wouldn’t pay much attention to something that will only be around for a day.  But look at these beauties!  Illustrated with such exquisite detail and precision.  It’s remarkable!

And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? Matthew 6:29

It blows my mind how remarkable and carefully made a simple flower can be…yet His word says I am even more valuable!

He will care for the flowers, how much more we He care for his people?
And what a reminder to enjoy each precious day.  Bad days happen to everyone.  But outside circumstances are just that…out side.  CHOOSING joy despite all that is where we “Bloom” (I couldn’t help myself I had to take that gardening pun)

So today is our day to shine… be what we were created to be.  Whether it rains, we get a flat tire or people are just mean.  Today is our day to bloom.